I don't feel like a particularly strong person most of the time. On any given day I'm doing everything I can just to stay afloat, and not necessarily playing to my strengths.
1. I know how to take charge of a group of people. The young men and young women in our ward are working on a special music number for Mother's Day, and yours truly has been put in charge of the whole affair. Well, this past Sunday, they all met together for the first time to practice. It was MASS CHAOS! So, I jumped up onto the piano bench (in my skirt, no less), told the kids that if they were going to act like 1st graders I would be happy to treat them like 1st graders, "1, 2, 3, eyes on me!", and quickly got them quieted down and organized into some semblance of a choir. The young women are used to me, but I'm sure the young men think I'm a complete psycho...
2. I know how to listen. It may not always seem like I'm listening, because often I have no idea how to respond or empathize with what you are going through, but I do know how to listen. I'm absorbing everything you tell me and filing it away to use when needed.
3. I'm a fairly decent mom. If there's one lesson that I've been taught repeatedly by T-Bone, it's patience. From his 8-days-late arrival into this world, to the mini-tantrums on a daily basis, he keeps me on my toes. However, I know that even someone as young as my little man needs boundaries, and he gets them. There are times that he'll try and push me and he'll come up against a brick wall. At the same time, I know how to just sit still and cuddle him while we read a story. I still have a lot (like, everything) to learn about being a mom, but I like to think that I'm holding my own.
4. I'm a pretty good cook. When I met and married Greasemonkey, he was an INCREDIBLY picky eater. What I've learned in the past 4 years, though, is that he's not picky as much as he's inexperienced. So I've been working on expanding his food acceptance. I generally try to make at least one new recipe a week, and the generally goes in my crockpot. Ironically enough, I'm a bit of a picky eater. I will try anything at least once, though.
5. I am fiercely loyal. Once you are part of my herd, I will protect you with everything I have. I take care of my own and will do everything in my power to make sure that they are happy, healthy, and living a good life.
I don't think anyone really likes to think about their weaknesses. I know it makes me uncomfortable. But, I promised to honestly answer all of these questions, so I'll do it regardless...
1. Food: Yes, food is one of my weaknesses (I am aware that this is not the kind of weakness you all were expecting, but it's my blog...). There is a reason that I have been overweight my whole life. I love food, and I love to eat. I am a comfort eater. When I am sad, I eat. When I am happy, I eat. When I am at a social gathering, I eat. When I am alone, I eat. Therefore, food equals weakness.
2. Sarcasm: I use sarcasm as a shield. In all honesty, I am an incredibly awkward person. I have a difficult time making immediate connections with other human beings. When I am uncomfortable my sarcasm rears it's ugly head, no matter how hard I fight it.
3. Laziness: My husband's standard line for any activity/chore/whatever that he doesn't finish is "I got lazy." In fact, we often joke that when he dies, I'm going to put "I was going to keep living, but I got lazy" on his tombstone. But the truth is, I'm just as lazy. I'd rather play Words With Friends than vacuum the floor. I'd rather read a book than weed the front yard. I'd rather play on Pinterest while watching reruns of How I Met Your Mother than fold laundry. It's just the way it is.
4. Shopping: I am a compulsive shopper. If I have a spare half hour, I can guarantee you'll find me cruising through Target or Old Navy. I love the thrill of finding a good bargain. I like the little high I get from buying new things. When I'm bored my mind automatically wanders to where I could be shopping, what I could be buying, to new things.
5. Feelings of Inadequacy: I know for a fact that this is a common problem among women. This is evidenced purely by the fact that I can think of at least 20 people that either repinned or facebooked THIS article. However, it is so difficult to not compare ourselves. I feel inadequate as a mom when I run out of patience. I feel adequate as a nurse when I lose my compassion for a patient. I feel inadequate as a wife when the house is a mess and dinner isn't on the table. I feel inadequate as a friend when I forget a birthday, choose to text instead of call, or bow out of plans. The problem is, who defined "adequate?"
This is a hard one for me, because while my life follows a very distinct pattern, every day is just a little bit different. For example, Monday is my Saturday: I do laundry, clean the house, grocery shop, etc. On Tuesdays, I work most of the day. Thursdays and Saturdays I spend half the day asleep after working all night long. Sundays are choir practice, church, and dinner at my parents house. So, since they're the only 2 that are anything alike, I'll describe the typical Wednesday/Friday.
I quit using an alarm clock after I had T-Bone. He is fairly predictable in his wake-up time. I usually drag myself out of bed around 8 am when I hear him talking to himself in his crib. We make our way into the kitchen for some breakfast, usually oatmeal for T-Bone and yogurt for me.
After breakfast we make our way downstairs to watch some Play With Me Sesame while we get dressed for our walk. We then spend an hour walking at either the mall or the parkway with our friends Amanda, Josh, and Jackson. Mama needs her exercise! Sometime on Wednesdays we play on the playground for a few minutes. On Fridays we go to my mom's school to do music time with the first graders.
Once we've had our fresh air, exercise, music, or playtime we'll head home and eat some lunch. T-Bone likes chicken nuggets, hot dogs, fruit, or cheese. I usually eat leftovers or a sandwich. After lunch we'll play with toys in the basement for awhile, or go kick the ball on the front lawn.
By this time, we're both ready for a nap, so I'll lay T-Bone down with his blankie and his Elmo, and turn on his Beatles/Queen lullaby mix. I give him a kiss, and tell him to have a good nappy. Then I'll go lay down for a nap myself in preparation for working the night shift.
After my nap I get up and get dressed for work. I make sure my bag is packed with my kindle or a book, pack a lunch, and probably brush my hair.
I hang out with my boys for a few minutes, and then it's off to work for the next 12 hours.
Somewhere in the mix I check Facebook, read my email, play on Pinterest for awhile, and occasionally blog. Usually the internet is just sort of on in the background and steal moments while T-Bone is otherwise occupied.
You know, usually this list is endless for me, but for some reason I'm having a hard time coming up with some on the spot. Alright, here we go:
1. People who chew with their mouth open. This also goes for people who fill their mouth so full of food that they physically CAN'T close it to chew. Gross.
2. Anytime someone starts a sentence with, "I don't mean to be rude, but..." or "No offense..." If you have to start your thought with that, don't say what you're about to say. These statements do not give you carte blanche to say whatever you want to. More than likely it's going to hurt the recipient's feelings.
3. When complete strangers say to me, "Wow, you're really tall. You must have played basketball in school." No, actually, I was a complete and total nerd.
4. People who stare at me while I'm working out. What, you've never seen an overweight girl sweatin' her booty off with bedhead and no makeup on?
5. General invasion of personal space. I don't have much of a personal space bubble, since I invade other peoples' for a living. But if I'm pregnant and you touch my belly without asking, you might lose a hand. (As a side note, you only need to ask once... that grants you endless belly-touching rights)
6. Internet arguing. Really? You think you're going to change Senor Troll's mind with your brilliant argument? Not likely.
7. Disregard for the well-being of pets. If you choose to be a dog/cat/fish/whatever owner, take care of them and train them right. I don't want your cat napping on my back porch. I don't want to hear your dog bark at 1 in the morning. I also don't want to watch you leave your pets outside 24/7 in the middle of the worst winter Utah has seen in years. Dogs need to be played with, people.
8. "You look tired." Just say what you mean and tell me I look like crap.
9. People who phrase everything like a question. Not only is it annoying, it's kind of confusing sometimes.
10. Wal Mart. Yep, Wally World is one of my pet peeves.
But I learned that there's a certain character that can be built from embarrassing yourself endlessly. If you can sit happy with embarrassment, there's not much else that can really get to ya. ~Christian Bale
I'm not an easily embarrassed person, I gave up on that a long time ago. I'm constantly doing something to make a fool of myself. However, there are a few times I can think of. There's that time in junior high that I fell UP the stairs... in front of the basketball team. Or the time I was in a job interview and forgot where I went to college (true story... I still got offered the job).
The time that really sticks out to me, though, is when I was in my second year of nursing school. I'd already been working in the healthcare field for a few years, so blood, poop, etc didn't really bother me anymore. Let me set the scene for you:
We were sitting in lab, where we were required to wear lab jackets over our clothes or scrubs. It was an unusually warm early spring day, so the building thermostat was still set for colder weather. We were studying post-partum care, and learning about lochia (if you don't know what that is, you probably don't want to know).
So, there we were, looking at different (lab created) examples of what lochia looked like. My stomach started feeling a little queasy, but I figured it was just because I'd skipped lunch that day and it was going on 3 o'clock. I figured I'd sit on one of the hospital beds and just relax for a minute. As I'm sitting there I break out into a cold sweat and start to get tunnel vision. I remember thinking that it sounded like my professor was talking through a concrete wall.
The next thing I know I'm opening my eyes and staring up at my classmates from the floor. A couple of the guys helped me onto the hospital bed while one of my other classmates checked my vital signs. My professor opened up her lunch box, handed me a little cup of peanut butter and a spoon, and told me to start eating.
So, there you have it, in black and white: my most embarrassing moment. I will forever be known as the girl who passed out in the postpartum nursing lab. (As it turns out, it was just a low blood sugar reaction, but still...)