This week I had a piece featured on Mormon Mommy Blogs. Apparently, without meaning to, I sparked quite a controversy. You see, I wrote about my plans to be a working mom. My thoughts and feelings on the subject seem to have hurt some feelings, unwittingly offended some fellow readers, raised a bit of ire in my general direction. This was not my intent. In the comments on said blog piece I have read everything from "thank you", to "I feel like I have to defend myself for being a stay at home mom", to "the prophets have counseled the women to be in the home". Apparently, by choosing to have a career as well as children, I am directly disobeying the prophet.
Let me just interject for a moment the following: if you are a stay at home mom, I applaud you. I understand that it is a full time job, and not for the faint of heart. You wear many hats and it takes a strong woman to hold her head high through that many costume changes. I have nothing against stay at home moms, and if that's what works for you family, fantastic! It was not my intent to belittle, attack, or in any way make light of the job you do. I have many close friends who have made the choice to stay at home, and I respect that a great deal.
However, I feel as though I need to explain myself a bit. (I know, anybody who disliked my piece that much isn't going to come read my personal blog, but I'll feel better). So, a few items of note:
1. I am a college educated woman. The skills that I have (and paid good money for) will not only assist me in the home, but they allow me to help others. I improve other people's lives. I did not go to college to get married. I went to college to better myself and to gain the knowledge to have a succesful nursing career.
2. I love my husband dearly, but it is not likely that any of his career choices will ever be able to solely support our family. And, rather than choosing to have me at home and him working multiple jobs, we've chosen to share the duties both in the home and in the workforce. At this point in time, we couldn't survive on his income as just the two of us, there's no way we could support a family on it.
3. My own personal sanity dictates that I need time outside the four walls of my home. Home is a haven, it's my favorite place to be, but even I get a little stir crazy if I don't get to see any other place. It is important for my own well-being as a person to experience adult interaction.
4. I don't feel like a bad member of the church for choosing to have a career. It is not a decision I have made lightly. I follow economical trends, I watch the housing market, and I keep a very tight budget for my husband and myself. The decision for me to keep a career is one that we have thought about, prayed about, and studied. We have discussed our choice with our families, church leaders, and asked for counself from our bishop.
All of that being said, let me apologize for any hurt feelings I may have cause. Again, this was not my intent. I simply ask that I be given the same courtesy I am extending to you. Judge not, lest ye be judged.
No longer private
3 years ago