On friendship...

"It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend."

~William Blake

I have a tendency to be a bad friend. It's true, and it's something I've accepted about myself. I've tried hard to work on it, but old habits die hard. Anyway, I was feeling a little reminiscent about life today (while I couldn't sleep because Joe was active) and let me tell you exactly why I'm a bad friend:

1. I gossip. I'm a woman, I'm a nurse, and once you get me going this mouth doesn't stop moving for much. I know a woman who has a policy that she doesn't talk about anyone who isn't physically in her presence at the time of the conversation. Wow, that's dedication. I don't know if I'll ever get to that point, but I would like to try harder to not backbite. It's a horrible, nasty habit, and one I should get rid of.

2. I'm a bit of a "one-upper". If you tell a story, I will probably try and tell one bigger and better. If something weird happened to you, I can come up with a time something weirder happened to me. Again, another bad habit, and one I should break. I need to learn to let other people have their moment.

3. I'm selfish. I use the "I" word... a lot. I like to talk about myself. This one is a strange phenomenon for me, though, because it doesn't happen in the presence of casual acquaintances or strangers. I only get this way around people I consider friends. Without meaning to, I will turn almost any conversation back around to myself.

4. I don't think before I act. I do dumb stuff. A lot of dumb stuff. I generally don't consider other people's feelings before I do dumb stuff, either. As an adult, I look back at a lot of things I did and said to my friends in high school and college, and I could kick myself for it. I'm sure I made a lot of people really uncomfortable with my actions.

5. I like to be in the limelight. This is sort of the wrap up of all of the above. I like to be the center of attention sometimes. If I help with a party, it's probably because I want something out of it. If I do you a favor, I'm usually going to find some way to let it benefit me. I struggle with selfless service.

6. I have no follow through. I never call when I say I will. I rarely plan things that I should plan. You really can't rely on me for much of anything. And in the process of not following through, I'll make up excuses for why I didn't do whatever I was supposed to.

7. My feelings get hurt easily. I may not always let you know it, but if I'm not involved it stings. I like to know your secrets. If you have a club, I want to be a part of it. If you're throwing a party, I want an invitation. If I feel left out, my feelings get hurt... and I just won't tell you that they're hurt.

So, let me just finish with saying this: if my actions in any of the before-mentioned categories have affected you in any way, I apologize. And I promise I'm going to work on being a better friend.

A short list

Well, we've been REALLY busy the last week or so, so I'm just going to make a list of everything that's going on.
~Baby Jo(e) is a boy! Names we are considering: Milo, Jonah, Collin, William (Liam), and Franklin. For the sake of "book names" on the blog though, we will refer to him from now on as Little Critter. At the ultrasound appointment the tech and the doctor were both frustrated that he wouldn't hold still for any good pictures... except to prove that he was a boy. My midwife also told me that because I'm tall my measurements will probably be off. Basically, I'm just going to look fat until like month 7.
~We moved! Hooray! Thanks again for everyone that helped with the big day. I'm almost all unpacked and get to start hanging pictures on the wall tomorrow.
~I don't, however, have internet in the new house. I may not for awhile. Be prepared for incredibly sporadic blogging.
~We closed on the above mentioned house. It was a big ordeal, but the papers are signed. Hallelujah. Now we get to spend the next 30 years paying it off. Think we can stay put that long?
~Coming back to work- Curious George and I both came back to work today. It was nice to spend the whole weekend together, but we had to get back to the grind eventually.

Next projects on the list:
~My backyard
~Curtains for the dining room
~Decoration Little Critter's nursery.

"There is nothing wrong with change, if it is in the right direction."

~Winston Churchill

Lately it seems like the only constant in my life is change. I'm not generally a big fan of change, to be complete honest. I think it's highly overrated. And yet... it seems like lately it can't happen fast enough for me.

I've been moving a bunch of our stuff out to the new house. I'm ready to close on it and be done for good. I still need to buy blinds, finish up some stuff in the yard, find a piano, and see if I can con Curious George into building me some shelves for the garage. All in all, though, it's coming a long. It's a little bit surreal to walk into that house and see all of my stuff sitting inside of it. I feel amazingly calm and completely at peace with this particular change. It's where we're supposed to go, and now is the time.

Another source of change is going on in my body. (I know, ew, more pregnancy talk!) Anyway, this one also doesn't seem to be changing quick enough for me. I have my 18 week ultrasound on Wednesday. Oh, don't forget to vote in my poll to the right. I want to know your opinions on the sex of Jo(e). The cute little chinese lady (who is, apparently, 95% right in her predictions) told me without any hesitation that Jo(e) is a girl. Next time I get a craving for Mountain City Chinese food I'll have to go back and tell her whether her prediction is right or not. I feel like the baby is girl, too, and my mom has claimed girl right from the start. I'll be completely honest, though, I don't care. I'm excited to find out so I can stop referring to the baby as "it", but beyond that the sex really doesn't matter to me.

It was Curious George's birthday this week. He turned the big 31. Yet another change... my husband is not just 30, but he's in his 30's. He's actually taking it rather well. I think he's finally warming up to the idea of being a daddy, and is starting to get excited instead of just being terrified. I know he's excited about the house and the prospect of having his very own workshop for the first time ever.

Those are just a few of the things changing in my world, what's new in yours?

I Know a Place...

This is Camp Brighton, we welcome you here.
We're glad you can linger awhile.
We know you'll be touched by the spirit of God,
and you'll leave with a tear and a smile.

Some of you may already know that I spent the summer before my Senior year of high school living away from home. It was one of the best and worst summers of my life, all rolled up into one. It was the summer when I really went from being a kid to a grown up, the summer when I laughed (and cried) more than any other, and the first time in my life I truly gained a testimony.

This weekend I had the wonderful opportunity to return to my home away from home, and Heavenly Father's summer home, Brighton LDS Girls Camp. I have been anticipating this weekend for months. I wasn't able to attend the last reunion in 2005, so this was a big deal for me. It had been eight years since I'd seen a lot of my friends, sung a lot of the songs, and spent the night at Brighton.

The theme of the reunion was "Rekindle: Friendship, Faith, and Fun." And rekindle I did! There were many memories shared, stories told, pictures taken, and tender moments. I was reminded over and over again why I fell in love with my "mountain home" in the first place. It was amazing to me how returning to Brighton made me feel 17 again (no, not like the Zac Efron movie). I felt energetic, young, a little nervous, and so excited to be there. I reconnected with many old friends, and made a few new ones.

While back at my beloved Brighton I fell in love all over again. I fell in love with the mountains, I fell in love with the spirit felt there, and I fell in love with Home. Not only did I leave with a sunburn and a few mosquito bites, but I truly did leave with a tear and a smile.

Whine, Whine, Whine

Let me just start this post off by saying that the fetus in my creepy fetus widget looks like Mr. Burns from the Simpsons.

Anyway, I feel like I've been in a bit of a funk lately. There are a lot of big things happening in my life, but for some reason I just feel a little blah. I think this is partly due to the feeling sick thing, partly due to the heat, and partly due to who knows what.

The first big problem: I feel fat. I know, I'm pregnant, I'm supposed to be fat. However, I don't look pregnant yet. I'm too big for my regular clothes, and too small for maternity clothes. I'm stuck in some middle-land of just looking like I've porked up for hibernation or something. And really, who hibernates in July?

The heat: Oh my, the heat. I seem to have no tolerance for it at all this summer. I wake up in the morning and our apartment is already at 79 degrees with the air conditioner running. Our air conditioning unit can't seem to keep up with the demand of our little apartment. It runs pretty much 24/7 just to keep the house slightly below 80. Needless to say, between the heat intolerance and the fat thing, I sit around in my underwear a lot. It's probably best if you don't drop by my house un-announced.

Moving: I really, really, really hate moving. I'm so excited and happy to be getting a house (especially one we can stay in for potentially a decade or more), but all I can think about is having to box up all of my stuff and cart it over there. With Curious George's bizarre work schedule, I'm going to end up doing most of the moving (of the small stuff, anyway) myself. Plus, he and I have already discussed that his idea of moving, and my idea of moving, are two VERY different ideas. Ok, so sometimes I'm a little bit of an organization nazi. Can I help it if I want to know where in the house a box belongs before I open it?

The sickness: I don't know if I just drew the pregnancy short straw, or if it's the heat, or working nights, or what, but I still feel sick at least 2 days a week. I'm almost 15 weeks, so I'm hoping that my pregnancy sickness shows itself out shortly, but for now I'm not coping so well. I've become best friends with my Zofran prescription, probably not a good thing.

The dreams: I've always had bizarre dreams, but really? This is getting a bit ridiculous. I dream like once a week that Curious George is leaving me, or has died, or whatever. I also keep dreaming about earthquakes. Which, for lack of a better term, freaks me the hell out. I hate earthquakes, and I really hate waking up in a panic that Curious George isn't home and won't be able to make it home because of the quake.

I do have a few fun things coming up to look forward to, though. Next week is my Brighton Staff Reunion, which should be a blast. I'll get to see a lot of women I haven't seen in a long time. My first big ultrasound is on August 18th, so we'll get to see if everything looks ok with Baby Jo(e), and we'll get to find out what we're having. I keep dreaming that the baby is a girl, so we'll see if I'm right. Curious George says he has a hunch it's a girl, too.

I know, I know... I should probably just go get some cheese to have with my whine. :)

The Price of Privacy

So, we're getting a house. Phew. We're getting a house. If I say it enough times will it seem real?

Anyway, the house is gorgeous, completely remodeled, and is generally fantastic. However, it has a downfall. No blinds. Yikes. We might want to remedy that situation before we move in.

While we're on the subject of the blinds, let me share a few things with you: our house has 11 windows. Only four of the 11 are the same size. The rest? Different, unusual sizes. Insert lengthy sigh here. Have you ever priced out blinds? The cheap ones will cost me $500 for the whole house. But, I can't just settle for the cheap ones, can I? No, I can't.

Oh, and we'll be losing a little more privacy (and some shade) after I get my way and yank out all the fruit trees. Oh, yeah, they are ALL coming out.

Anyway, I just wanted to let you all know that privacy doesn't come cheap... prepare accordingly.

Weekend Report

So, it's 5:30 in the morning, and I'm blogging to keep myself from wanting to throw up. True story.

Anyway, it was definitely time for an update. There are lots of big things happening in the Borges' household right now.

I had another appointment with the midwives last week. Everything looks good. The midwife could hear Baby Jo(e)'s heartbeat, but Steve and I weren't able to, so she did another early ultrasound. It's so weird to me to be able to look at that fetus on the screen and know it's growing inside me. I ate (drank?) a slurpee right before my appointment so, Baby Jo(e) was pretty active. I'll have to remember that for next time when we get to find out the gender (sex? I never know which term is PC anymore). My weight gain has also slowed, which is a relief, and I ended up gaining about 7 pounds in my first trimester. Not too shabby. Oh, and yes, I added a creepy fetus widget to my sidebar. It seemed like the easiest way to track how many days without making a paper chain. Although I still might make a paper chain.

The other big news is that we're getting a house. Hooray! It's an adorable split entry in Taylorsville, in the neighborhood that a lot of my friends grew up in. We move in sometime in mid-August. The whole house has been completely remodeled, so we won't have to do a single thing to it. The yard, on the other hand, is going to need some work. There about 5 or 6 fruit trees between the front and back yard (and I don't do fruit trees). So, all of those are going to have to come out over the next little while. But, it's got space out back for a little garden, and maybe a dog somewhere down the road. I've already started shopping for blinds (it has a TON of windows!), a fridge (kind of necessary), a big comfy couch for the basement, and maybe a piano. I'm thinking the vacation we were going to take this fall is actually going to be spent moving and the money spent purchasing house stuff.
So, it's looking like August is going to be a pretty busy month for us: our 2nd anniversary on the 5th, Curious George's birthday on the 11th, moving sometime between the 9th and 15th, and The Big Ultrasound on the 18th.

Sheesh... can the blog keep up?