A Little Bit of Controversy

This week I had a piece featured on Mormon Mommy Blogs. Apparently, without meaning to, I sparked quite a controversy. You see, I wrote about my plans to be a working mom. My thoughts and feelings on the subject seem to have hurt some feelings, unwittingly offended some fellow readers, raised a bit of ire in my general direction. This was not my intent. In the comments on said blog piece I have read everything from "thank you", to "I feel like I have to defend myself for being a stay at home mom", to "the prophets have counseled the women to be in the home". Apparently, by choosing to have a career as well as children, I am directly disobeying the prophet.

Let me just interject for a moment the following: if you are a stay at home mom, I applaud you. I understand that it is a full time job, and not for the faint of heart. You wear many hats and it takes a strong woman to hold her head high through that many costume changes. I have nothing against stay at home moms, and if that's what works for you family, fantastic! It was not my intent to belittle, attack, or in any way make light of the job you do. I have many close friends who have made the choice to stay at home, and I respect that a great deal.

However, I feel as though I need to explain myself a bit. (I know, anybody who disliked my piece that much isn't going to come read my personal blog, but I'll feel better). So, a few items of note:

1. I am a college educated woman. The skills that I have (and paid good money for) will not only assist me in the home, but they allow me to help others. I improve other people's lives. I did not go to college to get married. I went to college to better myself and to gain the knowledge to have a succesful nursing career.

2. I love my husband dearly, but it is not likely that any of his career choices will ever be able to solely support our family. And, rather than choosing to have me at home and him working multiple jobs, we've chosen to share the duties both in the home and in the workforce. At this point in time, we couldn't survive on his income as just the two of us, there's no way we could support a family on it.

3. My own personal sanity dictates that I need time outside the four walls of my home. Home is a haven, it's my favorite place to be, but even I get a little stir crazy if I don't get to see any other place. It is important for my own well-being as a person to experience adult interaction.

4. I don't feel like a bad member of the church for choosing to have a career. It is not a decision I have made lightly. I follow economical trends, I watch the housing market, and I keep a very tight budget for my husband and myself. The decision for me to keep a career is one that we have thought about, prayed about, and studied. We have discussed our choice with our families, church leaders, and asked for counself from our bishop.

All of that being said, let me apologize for any hurt feelings I may have cause. Again, this was not my intent. I simply ask that I be given the same courtesy I am extending to you. Judge not, lest ye be judged.

A Little Hypocrisy

I'm a hypocrite.

In my work as a nurse I get the opportunity to tell people to buck up. What they're going through is not the end of the world. There's always someone out there who has it worse.

Yet, when I'm sick, I turn into the world's biggest whiner. I get lazy, grumpy, and sometimes just plain mean.

This past week I've been a slug. I do nothing but lay around. I make myself get up and do the necessary things, but it's a struggle. I don't feel like eating, and consequently cooking, so Curious George has sort of been fending for himself. My throat hurts, my sinuses are full to the point of exploding, and all of the nastiness going on in my body is making me nauseous. Yeah, I'm whining. It's my blog, so what.

Anyway, back to being a hypocrite: Curious George told me to buck up. He told me that my life was not ending. It was just a sinus infection and I would get through it. And you know what I did? I cried. I broke down and bawled like a baby. Let me tell you, it didn't help the congestion any. So, most of the time I'm pretty mellow and even. I don't get riled up about much. So, when I break down like that it scares him a little bit. He quickly began to backpedal.

I reassured him that I was fine, I was just being a baby. And then I realized what a hypocrite I am. How can I expect to tell people with life-changing health problems to buck up when I melt down over a sinus infection?

But you know what? I still look something like this:

so I'm going to milk it for all it's worth!

Surprise!

I don't like surprises.

I can handle small things like Christmas, birthdays, etc, but if it's something big I don't like to be surprised. For example, if Curious George were to surprise me with a trip somewhere I would be bugged. Instead of thinking about how fun it would be to go on said surprise trip, I would be thinking about all of the things I need to do before we can go. I would think about asking for time off work, whether we needed new tires for the car before we went, etc.

However, I love to surprise Curious George with things. For his 30th birthday last year I threw him a surprise party. I love to get him little gifts that he doesn't know are coming. I love to surprise him.

Anyway, I was thinking last week that we've never been on a "real" vacation together. We've been fishing with the family, we went hiking in Zion for our honeymoon, and we've been on little local-ish trips. But, when I went to New York I went with the girls. It's been ages since either of us has been to Disneyland. It's been a decade since I sent to Europe, and neither of us has been on a cruise.

So, I've decided that for his birthday I want to surprise him with a trip somewhere. Hawaii is out, mostly cause we can't afford it, and also because Little Brother is there. There's no way we can do Europe. So, I'm thinking maybe San Diego. We could drive there, spend a day at Sea World, go to the zoo, and maybe spend a little time at the beach. Or we could do Disneyland. I haven't been since I was 18, he hasn't been since he was 7 (yeah, it's been 23 years since he saw Disneyland). Or maybe a short cruise. Who knows where we'll end up.

So, where would you take your significant other on a surprise vacation?

Learning Something New

Today I bring you an educational blog. We will be discussing the rules of frisbee golf, from a distant observers point of view.

1. The Dress Code: Clothing inhibits your throw, so less is definitely more. For women, shorty shorts and a tube top seem to be the best option. For men, just go shirtless. That seems to be the norm. However, boys, should you choose to wear a shirt it is encouraged that it either be a wife-beater tank top or contain a picture of one of the following: Bob Marley, a pot leaf, the Insane Clown Posse, or some sort of animal with antlers.

2. Bringing Baby: This is a game for the whole family. If you have a baby or a dog, bring them along! However, this game makes it clear, pushing the baby stroller is the woman's job. Also, I would recommend putting a leash on your dog (or your baby, if that's how you roll) so it can't chase down and mangle your vast collection of frisbees.

3. The Gear: If you plan on playing often I would recommend spending a large sum of money on frisbees of different weights, sizes, and colors. In fact, I would buy two of each, because it is inevitable that one will end up in the middle of the road and run over by a car. It is also important that you get the proper bag to carry all of your new overpriced plastic dinner plates. This way, they are organized and you can always claim that you can't push the stroller because you have to carry your murse.

4. Practice Makes Perfect: Since this "sport" seems so popular you will almost always end up waiting to start your turn through the course. While waiting it is customary to practice your throw. In fact, it is encouraged. However, one very strict rule is that you must use your playing companion as a target. Trust me, they like it.

5. The Casual Observer: This one is mostly for the women. If you're not going to play, you don't have a stroller to push, or a dog to control, it is recommended that you stand sullenly to one side, complain about how bored you are, twirl your hair, and pick your fingernails.

So, there you have the rules of frisbee golf according to a distant observer. Come on, it's fun to learn new things!

Disclaimer: This is meant to be a humorous blog post and does not in any way actually teach the game of frisbee golf.

Aw, Do I Have To Go?

This is generally the face I make on Stake Conference Sunday (minus the hat and the airport setting, of course):I can give you any number of reasons for why I don't like to go to Stake Conference, a few being:
~I can't sit still that long
~I get cold sitting in the gym
~It's not necessarily the most enjoyable of meetings. It's usually a lot of information crammed into some dry talks

Anyway, all of these excuses (cause that's what they are) were some that I gave my husband for not wanting to go to Stake Conference today. A few wise words from Pops, you remember him from earlier this week, convinced us that we needed to go.

Man, am I glad we did. As you could probably tell from my last post I've been struggling this week. There are a few things that right now that I want so badly I can taste them (take my word on this one: according to my desires houses don't taste good... neither do babies). I've been having a hard time containing my jealousy, disappointment, and anxiety about these things. We sat through almost the entire meeting, except the rest hymn. We stood for that one. Finally the stake president got up to speak, as the final wrap-up for the day.

The first words of his talk went something like this:
"Do not give up hope. Have faith. Do not despair."

I was immediately a smushy, bawling mess. He continued on his talk to discuss the benefits of having hope, faith, and remaining cheerful in the face of adversity. He counseled us that if we are faithful and continue to work hard at obeying the commandments, our righteous desires would be granted to us.

So, just a quick thank you to President Brinkerhoff for restoring my hope, for reminding me to be cheerful, and for reassuring me while I was in a dark place.

Never again will I doubt the power of Stake Conference.